My Grandmother Never Sent a Tweet

As I was registering online for a free program this morning I thought it was clever that the organization required that I send a tweet as a part of the registration process.  First of all let me admit right here that the program I registered for is Oprah Winfrey’s Life Class.   I figured I might as well get that out of the way and it can’t hurt to give Oprah a shameless plug on my blog.  What Oprah and her team have long ago figured out is the real power of social media to advance a program, product, or an idea.  That alone was powerful for me.  But somehow right after completing my registration and hoping I would win the sweepstakes prize of attending the live show (I plan to give the prize to my Mom and Mother-In-Law if I win) I began to think of my maternal grandmother.  My first thought was that even though she died in the fall of 1989 she never had an email address.  That was not so unusual in 1989 but I wonder if she were alive today would she have one.

My grandmother was a writer.  She never had her words published but she wrote poetry and stories.  She reached the status in the church I grew up in to be considered a Mother of the church which is a position of status given to older members that were faithful and spiritual.  As a Mother she had many opportunities to speak before the church.  Every time I heard her speak at church she would recite or read one of her poems or stories.  I don’t know if she ever saved her writings and if she did I don’t know what became of them after her death.  Her poems always rhymed and her stories almost always shared an important life lesson and biblical advice.  She loved to share these writings with the public and she referred to them as “pieces.”  She even wrote pieces for me as a child and therein provided my earliest opportunities to speak in public as my pieces were written for me to memorize and read in front of the church on special occasions or during children’s programs.  I learned to speak in the church and I learned the power of story there too.

In addition to writing stories and poems my grandmother wrote letters.  I first became the beneficiary of her letters during my early years in the military.  Later, when I moved away from Philadelphia for work she wrote much more frequently.  I also wrote letters to her.  In fact each year I would buy the best stationary I could find for her so that she could write her letters on “good” paper which was important to her.  She liked to make a good impression on people.  

When I read my grandmother’s letters I always hear her voice.  I have become convinced over the years that her purpose in writing was to pass along lessons and advice that would endure beyond her lifetime.  If that was her purpose she was right as I have read her letters during some of my difficult as well as happy times in my life.  Letters have an enduring power somewhat like the power of a favorite book.  You go back to them to re-read to find a nugget of information, advice or to reinforce something you learned long ago.  

So I have already said that my grandmother did not have an email address and of course she never sent a tweet.  In fact I can imagine that she would have considered the idea to be weird to tweet the sometimes personal details of our lives to complete strangers.  Plus, I don’t think my grandmother would have done well with the 140 character limitation of a tweet.   Although I get a laugh when I imagine grandma writing “Just finished watching General Hospital LMFAO.”  Of course she was a lady that would never have used the term LMFAO but just the thought brought back images for me.  

Today so many of us tweet our thoughts, post intimate details of our lives on Face Book,  blog about our success, failures, thoughts and ideas.  Yet, I wonder how often we just take the time to write a letter.  My experience over these past thirty years is that letters have an enduring power.  Maybe someday we will read email messages posted 30 years ago but somehow I doubt it.  I can’t imagine someone outside of the government keeping an archive of our tweets and saving them for posterity.  I fear my blog post someday will fade into an archive after I die that can’t be accessed without my password thus causing them to be lost forever.  But letters, these won’t just fade away.  When we write a letter I imagine that the reader will save it.  Perhaps they will take the time to read it again and again.  Letters, provide an opportunity for clarity that you can’t have in a tweet, or most email messages.  Letters take far more time than other means of communication.  You write, read, and rewrite to make sure the points are made perfectly.  Some people even hand write their letters then rewrite the handwritten version to make it perfect.  There is something about this process that gives greater depth to a letter.  Our letters will usually be saved and we know that so we try to give our best efforts when we write one.

Next week is my mother’s 75th birthday.  I will call her on her birthday, but today I am going to write a letter to her.  I plan to ask my sons to do the same.  While my mom has a preference for birthday cards I want her to read and to hear the words that we say.  I want her to be able to retain the thoughts so that she can read them years from now.  I want her to hear our separate voices and I want her to connect with the fact that this took time and attention which reflects that we love her.  

If this post impresses you at all would you also write a letter this weekend?  Maybe you have a friend that has not heard from you in a while and a letter would be a welcome surprise.  Perhaps a letter of apology to a damaged relationship or a letter of encouragement to someone that is struggling will make all the difference.  You could also write a love letter this weekend as surely there is someone in the world you love.  It does not need to be very long or even elegant, but you can not beat the power of your words put on paper for just one person to see.  That is probably why my grandmother never sent a tweet.