Monday, February 14, 2005

Looking Backwards to Move Forward

Today I want to go back to my favorite analogy for leading and living a balanced life. That is the analogy of seeing our lives as though we are at the center of a compass. Today I want to talk about what it takes to get a true reading of your direction.

I have held a license to drive in the state of Pennsylvania for more than 34 years. In that time despite years of practice, I have finally come to realize that I am not a good driver. This has been pointed out to me many times but I have always turned a deaf ear to the complainer. Like Rain Main, I continue to repeat over and over “I am an excellent driver”. Of course, in that movie Rain Main was only driving in a circle. I think that I can do circles just fine, but I have trouble with the whole left turn, right turn, stay in your lane and don’t get too close thing. I have never once hit a pedestrian or animal, and never in my experience has a passenger in my vehicle been hurt. But I have put fear in the hearts of many. I choose not recount my total driving record here, but suffice it to say that in a one year period I had three accidents in a parking lot. This was the exact same parking lot in which I parked daily for three years. Fortunately, only during one of those accidents were there passengers in the car. Lately, I have been limited to principally driving my Vespa, and it seems for now at least that may be the safest thing that I can do.

I have determined in my infinite wisdom that the problem for me is not that I have a particular difficulty or lack of ability that affects my driving. Rather, my problem is that I am frequently looking backwards when moving forward. Further complicating my problems is that I am often thinking about where I want to go, and not focusing on where I am and how I am going to get there. I have reasoned that these are terrible attributes when it comes to driving and thus my conclusion that I am not a good driver. However, these are most worthy attributes when it comes to viewing our life direction and personal goals.

When I was thinking about this topic I was directed back to the book of Numbers in the Bible. This is a book that I have always had difficulty reading because of the extensive and often times tedious lists that it contains. I struggle my way through this book often times unable to pronounce the myriad names, terms, and places mentioned. Today I took time to read the 33rd chapter which chronicles the stages of Israel’s journey to get to the Promised Land. In this chapter Moses, who for the more visual among us looks exactly like Charlton Heston, is commanded by God to record the stages in their journey. Charlton Heston, I mean Moses, dutifully and copiously records every stage of the Israelites journey. The list of names and places is fairly long, and for me the gymnastics required of my tongue is exhausting. Reading this list a pattern appears. That is that each time a place is named as a stage in the journey, Moses repeats the name of that place as he lists the next destination. This suggest to me that every time the Israelites wanted to move forward towards their goal of reaching the Promised Land, they always first looked backwards.

Often times I find that we live our lives with varying degrees of focus on our goals and desires. Those considered more successful among us are said to have had a keen focus on their goals. We often hear of such people with statements like “she really knows what she wants.” Perhaps this is true when the goals we seek are material. I for one no longer view success by measuring the things we have. In fact, I believe that most of us view real success not by what we have, but by what we want to do or what we want to be. We need only to look back at our list of New Year resolutions to find that this is true. As we mature, who we are or what we do becomes our measure of success.

As we seek to live more balanced or principle centered lives, lives with V.O.I.C.E. we must determine our place in the world. We must take the time to determine where we want to go, and what we want to become. There is a process of looking back that I try to practice weekly. In order to do this you must find quiet time for reflection. This is the equivalent of standing still with your compass to get a true reading. During this time, you must think first about the following: Your passion, focus, perspective, balance, choices and potential for growth.

In thinking about your passion, ask yourself what your heart, mind and spirit tell you that you want to create, develop, preserve or support. Your focus, is where you review the goals you have established for yourself and your life. Next you will think about your perspective. Look at the big picture, not just the pressing emergencies that are clanging for your attention. Here you will determine your schedule for the coming week. When thinking of balance, think about the people and things that are important to you. Are you spending time with all of these people and doing all of these things? What adjustments do you need to make. Review your choices. Have you made decisions that reflect your integrity to do what you said you would do? Have you kept your promises and your commitments? The final area for your quiet review is the potential for growth. Looking back at the past week, you must honestly evaluate where you have been. Perhaps it is time to realign to make sure you are staying on course. Did you accomplish what you set out to do last week? Was what you set out to do realistic? What patterns are you seeing that keep you from achieving your goals? Are there people or other distractions that hinder your progress? Where do these people fit in your life?

Looking backwards to move forward will act as a touchstone for your life. You can through this process determine that your goals are genuine and meaningful. This will force you to quiet your mind and your environment. You must be honest with yourself. Admit where you may be missing the mark. Make course corrections. Find a guide if you are lost. Look backwards weekly and you will move forward daily.

Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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